Love Is A Losing Game
by OneThousandAndOne
Summary: A Naya/Heather RPF based on a tradition for Leap Year Day. k  for language
1. Chapter 1

Naya heard about a tradition in which on Leap Year Day, girls are the one who are "suppose" propose to their partner. She'd read up on a few weeks ago, when she was bored at home, wishing she was spending time with Heather. Today she's sat in her trailer, a ring in a black velvet box across the table from her, quietly sobbing because there is no way that Heather would marry her.

Within seconds the door to her trailer is burst open and a beaming blonde haired beauty is bounding into Naya's trailer. "Nay-", she pauses when she notices her best friend slumped in the the seat, tear tracks on her sodden cheeks. She looks at the ring box. "Who gave you that?" she asked, her blood running cold at the thought of someone taking her away.

Naya shakes her head sadly and sobs out, "I was suppose to give it to someone"

"Who?" Heather blurts out quickly. Naya remains silent. Her body overwrought with sadness. Heather's eyes are glued on Naya, who slowly brings her head up and connects her eyeline to Heather. Eyes that were once strong and dark seemed almost grey with emotion. Unspoken words between them both sound louder than if either of them had said a thing. Heather hangs her head after what felt like the longest minute, "Nay.." she sighs, "I can't..." she turns on her heel and walks away.

Heather closed the door behind her and took a deep breath to supress the onslaught of emotion that was coursing it's way through her body. She stepped down the few steps and stopped at the bottom. She turned to face the door in a last minute change of mind and walked back up the steps. Just as she reached out her hand to pull the handle she could hear Naya crying.

In another world she would have stepped through the door and ceased the moment, taking the ring and sliding it on her slender finger. She would have flung her arms so tightly around Naya, showering her in kisses, repeating, "Yes Nay of course i'll marry you," over and over until she believed it. But this was the real world. She had a long term boyfriend who she loved. And although Naya was buried deep in her heart, it had to be this way.

Behind the trailer door, Naya cried until every last tear was squeezed out. It felt like forever. It wasn't just the emotional pain but the physical one and her heart was crying with her. That's what having a broken heart felt like. She could feel it falling to pieces in her chest. She would rather not be here than feel like this.

Her phone vibrated against her leg and she was pulled back to reality. A tiny ray of hope ran through her as she pulled the phone out of her pocket and closed her eyes, hoping to open them to see the only name she needed to see. It wasn't her. she slid the phone across the table watching as it went too far and fell off the other side. She made no attempt to catch it before it fell. "Stupid piece of crap" she mumbled to herself.

Her phone buzzed again and she ignored it. She didn't want to be tormented with messages or calls that werent from Heather. She was the only one Naya wanted contact with, but ironically Heather was the one person who wouldn't contact her.

She slumped forward and laid her head on her arms which were laid out in front of her to form a headrest.

Just as she got comfortable, there was a loud knocking noise on her door, "Leave me alone!" she yelled at the person behind the door.

They knocked again, louder and for longer, "I said get lost!" she angrily shouted again.

The knocking became more frantic. Naya got up from her seat, letting out an angry puff of air and reached for the handle and swung the door open, "I said fuck-"

She stopped mid sentence. And glared at the person standing before her. Their eyes red and puffy and full of tears

Her heart quickened in her chest and she wasn't aware that she was talking until she actually heard herself, "What are you.. I mean.. What... Wh-why are you crying?" she stammered.

"I love you," Heather replied, voice thick with raw emotion. She swallowed any kind of sob that was threatening to ruin the moment. "I love you Naya." She paused and dropped her head to look at the floor. "I don't know if we can ever be together, things are complicated.." she raised her head to capture Naya's eyes in her own, "I just want you to know that I love you"

Naya stood still, her facial expression remained emotionless, not wanting to give anything away in fear of getting hurt. She'd been here too many times, usually with guys. Saying they love you one minute then the next walking out of her life forever. She had to keep her guard up.

"Please say something Naya," Heather pleads, "please.. Just anything,"

The atmosphere that hung between them was almost a smog, that caught in the back of your throat, leaving you unable to breath. It's opaqueness awash with a raw emotion that felt foreign to both of them.

Heather barring her soul was a first. Naya was the only one who had shared her feelings. The sincerity in Heathers tone felt like a bonding agent that was trying its best to piece together the fragments of Naya's broken heart.

Naya stepped back in an invitational way and Heather took a step forward. Naya shook her head and put a hand up in between them, it lightly brushed Heathers stomach before she flinched it back to her side.

Heather quirked her eyebrow in confusion and stepped back to the top step where she originally stood.

Naya opened and closed her mouth to speak. An internal conflict rendering her speechless for the minute. She knew her shattered heart was telling her to say what she felt, but her head being the louder and wiser voice at that moment, took charge of the situation at hand. She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders in defeat, "I can't," she spoke out softly, stepped back and closed the door on her best friend.

Heather stood rooted to the spot. Her heart constricting in her chest which seemed to be pulling at her lung, stopping her from breathing altogether. She opened her mouth to get an intake of air but nothing came and her pulse started to race. She turned quickly making everything spin in it's place and made her way down the steps. Nothing was still. It was swaying around her and she wanted nothing more than to get to her trailer as quick as she could.

Putting one foot in front of the other to move, normally seemed like something her body did involuntarily, but today she had to think about every step she took. It felt like she was trudging through mud, with each foot falling further and further into the ground, the closer she got.

With all the strength she had left in her body she ran up the steps, yanking the handle of her trailer down and falling forward on the floor behind the door. She kicked it closed and and lay still on the floor.

She wanted to cry out, she wanted to scream and kick her legs out in any kind of release that would stop this dull ache in her chest. But no one would hear, no one would come and help and see what was going on and not just anyone, Naya. She wouldn't come to her rescue this time. This time her heroine wouldn't be there to save her from the darkness.

She dragged her body to an upright position and moved herself, until her back was flush with the door, stopping anyone from barging in on her.

She stared straight ahead, focusing on nothing in her eyeline, but everything in her head. She moved her hand to push away the hair that had fallen down around her face and thats when she realised she was crying. Her body had given in to the wave of emotion that wracked her body and she felt hot tears fall off her chin and onto her shirt.

She let herself cry for a few minutes, until she stood up to move to the table where she spotted her iPod sat charging in it's docking station. She figured she could put some music on and cry to her hearts content and no one would hear her above the sound of the music.

She pressed play_ "There's always that one person who will always have your heart.."_ Usher's soulful voice sung out. Her breath hitched in her throat and she skipped the track.

The soft thump of a RnB base chimed in before the sultry vocals of Alicia Keys rang out,_ "Even if you are a million miles away, I can still feel you in my bed.."_

She angrily grabbed the iPod and threw it onto the sofa and it bounced off a cushion and onto the floor by her feet. She fell backwards onto the sofa and let her body cry.

Heather never cried like this. Every time she'd fallen out with Taylor she'd be angry and hurt but she'd never cry like this. She'd felt loss but never to this extent.. The last time she felt like this.. Well that just didn't bear thinking about but it felt the same. Like someone had taken her heart right out of her chest, found the special part of it saved for Naya, with a picture of them together and ripped it to shreds and discarded it, like it meant nothing.

"Wh-why-y-y?" she sobbed to herself. She knew no one could answer or would answer but she just needed to know why.

Her phone beeped in her pocket and with frantic movement she pulled the phone out of her pocket.

Dianna's name flashed on the screen and she read the message. "Is Naya with you? She won't pick up her phone."

She ignored the text. Why would anyone think she would be with Naya..oh yeah because they're best friends she scoffed to herself.

Her phone beeped again. With a roll of her eyes she looked at the screen. Her eyes widdend when she saw the name 'Naya 3' she swiped the message across the screen to see what she had to say.

":'(" was all the message said.

She sobbed out a few tears and wiped them away with the back of her hand before replying with the same message back ":'("

She sat in silence for a few minutes before she grabbed her bag and made her way to the tin shed. If there was one thing that Heather could do, it was dance away her emotions.

She opened the door cautiously, snaking her head around the edge of the door to see if anyone was in there. The lights were off and the squeak of the door echoed off the walls. The only light was a flickering one in the corner, that never seemed to get fixed, despite their numerous complaints. The lighting staff were getting slack.

She reached to the side for the light switch, squinting as the light flashed on, abruptly. She threw her bag on the floor and walked toward the stereo system. She no idea of the music that would come out of the speakers as she pressed play, all she knew was that she wanted to dance.

As Florences's haunting lyrics sung out through the speakers, Heather looked at herself in the mirror.

_"Regrets collect like old friends, here to relive your darkest moments, I can see no way, I can see no way, and all of the ghouls come out to play.."_

She rolled her neck and and her wrists, stretching out her arms and shaking her legs, watching herself in the mirror. Her eyes seemed sunken in and were no longer the sapphire blue that lit up the room. A pained expression across her face.

She moved around the room with grace, reverting back to her early dance lessons. She missed contemporary dance now that she'd thrown her heart into street dance classes.

She moved around the studio with such fluidity, embracing the freedom the music allowed her to feel.

_"Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out woah.. It's hard to dance with the devil on your back, so shake him off woah.."_

Her phone was ringing in her bag, but she couldn't hear it due to the music's volume and the fact that she was lost in her movements. It rang again but to no avail.

_"And given half the chance would I take any of it back, it's a final mess but its left me so empty, it's always darkest before the dawn.."_

A few stray tears escaped her eyes and she felt the lyrics as she danced. She spun on the spot a few times to try and rid the feelings that had crept up on her and she moved off the spot to the front of the room and moved in time with the beat.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw the door move slowly and watched someone slip inside. She made no attempt to swing her head to get a better look, but she knew who it was. They sat on the floor by the door to try and keep out of sight.

"And I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't, and here's to drinks in the dark at the end of my road.."

As the last chorus played out, Heather dropped back into the song and moved accordingly. She ended with her head down in front of her.

"You knew I was here didn't you," the voice called out, cutting through the silence. It bounced around the room making it sound louder than it actually was.

"Yeah," was all Heather managed to say. She brought her head up and looked back in the mirror. She daren't make eye contact with them.

"Who were you dancing for at the end there Heather?" they asked, assure they knew the answer to the question.

"Me," Heather replied, making no attempt to look their way and acknowledge their presence.

"No it wasn't.." they argued back.

She turned her head quickly, to face them, anger forming on her face, "Did you think that was for you?" she shot back.

"I know it was for me," they replied timidity and stood up.

Heather balled her fists, her knuckles turning White with rage. She stormed across the studio, "Do you think everything in this world is about you Naya? Do you think everything I do is about you? Can you not see how hurt I am, that maybe I just wanted to dance?" she shouted louder than she thought it was.

"I'm sorry," Naya replied in the smallest voice possible, "I shouldn't have come here.. I just..,"she sighed, "Nothing, I should go." she turned and made her way to the door.

"Don't go," Heather called after her.

Naya stopped walking and turned around to face Heather. Their eyes, both full of sadness and hurt, locked into each other in that all too familiar way they were used to.

"Why did you come here?" Heather asked, swallowing her apprehension for the answer.

Naya walked back towards Heather and stood in front of her, not too close but close enough that it wouldn't feel too uncomfortable. "I umm..." she cleared her throat, "I wanted to sing you a song." she looked at Heathers face for a reaction.

"This isn't Glee club, Nay, this is real life and singing songs doesn't make things go away," Heather sighed.

"Please," asked Naya, "just hear me out. If you've heard enough just tell me and I'll shut up and leave, okay?"

Heather thought about it for a few seconds, then nodded her head, "okay." she made her way to middle of the studio and watched as Naya stood in front of her taking deep breaths. "Do you need me to play any music?" she asked.

"No.. Thank you, I um.. I want to sing acapella to you," Naya said, wringing her hands over and over, to try and calm herself down. It was a nervous twitch that she never grew out of and couldn't stop no matter how much she hated it. It had even started spilling out into her acting.

Naya stood in front of the mirror and took one final deep breath before she started.

_"I feel weak, we've been here before,_

_'Cause I feel we keep going back and forth,_

_Maybe it's over, maybe we're through,_

_But I honestly can say I still love you,_

_Maybe we reached the mountain peak,_

_And there's no more left to climb,_

_And maybe we lost the magic piece,_

_And we're both too blind to find,_

_Let's start over,_

_Let's give love their wings,_

_Let's start over,_

_Stop fighting 'bout the same old thing,_

_Let's start over,_

_We can't let our good love die,_

_Maybe we can start over,_

_Give love another life,_

_I can see that we're not happy here,_

_So why would we keep pretending when there's nothing there?_

_Maybe you like it, well, I don't,_

_And maybe you'll settle, well, I won't,_

_Maybe we reached the mountain peak,_

_And there's no more left to climb,_

_And maybe we lost the magic piece,_

_And we're both too blind to find,_

_Let's start over,_

_Let's give love their wings,_

_Let's start over,_

_Stop fighting about the same old thing,_

_Let's start over,_

_We can't let our good love die,_

_Maybe we can start over,_

_Give love another life,_

_I know that this will hurt you,_

_I know you'll cry,_

_I know I called you selfish, but that's a lie,_

_I feel I know that's the best for us,_

_Let's start over.."_

She stopped singing as her voice broke on the last note and tears spilled out.

Heather stood up from her seated position and faced Naya, "That was on our playlist."

Naya took a deep breath and smiled a small but sad smile, "Mmhmmm," she answered back.

The silence that fell between them seemed like the loudest thing in the room. The static noise ringing in their ears.

"Is that what you really want?" Heather asked, trying to mask any emotion. If she showed any, she wasn't sure what it would be. Should she be angry that by singing a song things would change? Should she still be hurt by the rejection that would haunt her for life? Happy that maybe Naya wanted to finally sort things between them?

"I think so," Naya replied, not able to look Heather in the eye.

"You think so? THINK?" she shouted, "You came here and sing me that song! That song Naya! With its hopeful lyrics and you *think*," she emphasized, "you want to be with me? What kind of messed up bullshit is this Nay?" She angrily marched past Naya and headed to where she left her bag.

"Heather please!" Naya called after her and jogged over to her. "It's not that easy."

"And you think it was easy for me to come over earlier and tell you I love you,"

"No, I know that's not easy, remember?"

Heather looked downcast, reminded of the day Naya had told her she was in love with her. she sighed, "You had a ring in that box today Naya. You were going to propose. So how can you only think you want to 'start over', " she aired quoted, "if you wanted to ask me to marry you?"

"What would have been your answer?"

"Does it really matter now?" Heather rubbed her forehead in frustration.

Naya shortened the gap between them and reached out to hold one of Heathers hands. She entwined their fingers together. They fit perfectly, like each others hand was carefully carved to sit flush with the other. "Yes, it does matter.." She squeezed Heathers hand, "Tell me what it would have been."

Heather took a deep breath, looked to the ground and scuffed the toe of her shoe along the floor. She lifted her head but didn't look at Naya.

She swallowed thickly before replying, "I probably would have said no.." her voice drifted off toward the end.

Naya let go of Heathers hand and stepped back.

She pinched the bridge of her noise and let put a small, sarcastic laugh, "I beg your pardon? No?"

Heather didn't say anything in return. There was nothing she could say. She didn't want to lie to Naya, she meant more to her than some healf hearted promise.

"Wait so let me get this straight. You come to my trailer, tell me you love me and because I'm hurt, Me, Heather not you, I'm hurt, I say I can't and you get upset. Then you come here, dance for me and don't even bother saying you weren't because I know you and I sing you a song about wanting to start again, from our stupid fucking playlist that god only knows why we made in the first place.." she flexes her hands in anger, trying to supress the frustration, "and I say I think that's what we should do, because hell if I know what the right thing to do here is, you get mad at me and then I ask you what your answer would have been if I had asked you to marry me.." she took a breath and shook her head, "and you say no!"

Heather stares back at Naya and bites her bottom lip. Her chins starts to wobble and she can feel herself wanting to cry.

"We're done Heather. I'm done here. You're very good at playing a game that I'm not interested in playing," she turns on her heel and walks back towards the door.

When she reaches the door she holds it open and turns back to Heather, "I guess love really is a losing game." She slams the door behind her.


	2. Chapter 2

Naya stood with her back to the door. She couldn't cry, she felt like she had cried enough and she wouldn't shed another tear over Heather. People who loved you weren't suppose to hurt you. People who loved you weren't suppose to make you cry. She was done having her heart beaten up and left derelict on a loveless floor. It wasn't good for her health or her mental well-being.

Now she was just angry. She knew anger didn't get you anywhere but what else was there left to feel? If she really was done, then a weight should have been lifted off her shoulders, but now her heart felt even heavier than it already did before all this mess started.

Naya made her way back to her trailer, storming past everything on her way, leaving it almost a blur.

"Naya!" Dianna called out, as she run up to her to catch up, "Hey wait up!"

Naya ignored Dianna's request and carried on her way. There was no way she was in the mood to talk to anyone right now.

"Naya!" Dianna called out again.

"Fuck off and leave me alone!" Naya shouted back and picked up speed.

Dianna caught up with her and grabbed hold of Naya's arm, turning her to face her "Excuse me?"

"I said. Fuck. Off!" Naya repeated and tried to turn her body to get out of Dianna's hold.

"Don't tell me," Dianna sighed and let go of Naya's arm, "You and Heather just had a little lovers tiff, right?"

"Screw you!"

"No Nay I'm not the one you wanna screw!" Dianna scoffed

"Can I help you with something?" Naya asked indignantly, folding her arms across herself, to form a protective barrier.

"Why didn't you answer your phone earlier? I called liked 4 times!"

"Maybe I didn't want to talk to stalkers who incessantly call me!"

"What is your problem?" Dianna asked putting her hands on her hips.

"What is your problem Di, I didn't want to talk. I don't know what the big deal is!"

"Look Naya," Dianna reached out and put her hand on Naya's arm, who shrugged it away and moved backwards, "whatever happened between you and Heather is none of my business-"

"You're absolutely right Dianna," Naya cut in, "it is none of your business, so like I said leave me alone!" She spun on the spot and walked away.

"She loves you, you know.." Dianna dropped off the rest of her sentence to get Naya's attention.

Naya carried on walking. She was not in the mood to hear a third party prospective on something that didn't concern them, no matter how close they were to her.

She got back into her trailer, threw her bag on the floor and sat on the couch. A million and one things going through her head and none of them making any real sense. She spotted the pile of CDs that she left by the radio.

She walked over to where they were sat on the side and began riffling through, until she found the one she wanted. Then she grabbed a piece of paper and pen and wrote a short note, grabbed the ring box, that was still sat glaring at her from the table and put it all together in the gift bag the ring had come in.

She walked over to Heathers trailer, dumped the bag on the steps and made her way to craft services.

When Heather got back to her trailer, she saw the gift bag sat on the step. She furrowed her eyebrow and picked it up before opening the door and walking inside.

She sat at the table and tipped the bag upside down to empty it's contents. The cd nearly rolled off the table and she grabbed it back before it fell onto the floor. Her heart skipped a beat and her blood went cold when she realised what she had been given.

Naya's curly cue handwriting, slightly smudged from where her hand dragged over the wet sharpie as she wrote, 'Heather and Naya's Infinite Playlist' written in the top of the cd with a heart on the side.

She placed the CD back on the table and looked at the folded over piece of paper. She deliberately ignored the ring box, knowing that would bring about a whole new wave of emotion she didnt want right now.

She opened up the note, it was all smudged and look rushed, 'Take it all. And let it all remind you of the friend you lost because of it.'

She folded the note back over and placed it in the bag, looking over to the black velvet ring box, that was screaming out to her.

She reached across and took the box in her hand, running the pads of her fingers over the velvety material, watching it brush one way and the next. She turned it over in her hands, too afraid of looking inside.

She swallowed thickly and opened it up, closing her eyes. She opened them slowly to the the the ring sat there in the box. It was a thin band with one single medium sized diamond set into the band. It was perfect. It wasnt flashy or boring. It was Naya. She took it out of the holder and twisted it around in her hand looking at it until something inside the band caught her eye. It had been engraved. She turned it until she could make out what it said. 'Fate' followed by six numbers. The date they first met.

It was all too much for Heather. She put the ring back in the box and back in the bag with the note, leaving just the cd left on the table, that probably symbolised much more than anyone could imagine.

Two and a half weeks earlier.

The sun had set on what had been an unusually sunny day in West Hollywood and Naya had just poured herself a glass of red wine and settled in for a night in front of the tv. She grabbed her phone off the coffee table and checked twitter and decided to make a quick tweet about Amber singing the late Whitney Houston classic in that nights episode of Glee.

Just as she put her phone onto the table, a knocking at her door startled her. Making her way over to the door she wondered who the hell would be turning up uninvited on Valentines night.

She opened the door to see her best friend standing there, with a bottle of wine and a sad look on her face.

"Heather what the hell are you doing here? I mean..," she stumbled on her words, "come in of course, but honey aren't you suppose to be on a date with Taylor?"

Heather walked through the door, plonked the bottle of wine on the table and threw herself onto the sofa behind her. "He was running late because he was with the guys and then we got in a fight because he's always late, so I told him not to bother and cancelled our meal," she sighed and folded her arms.

Naya sat down next to Heather and squeezed the top of her arm comfortingly, "Sorry he's such an ass!"

"Yeah," Heather murmured through her frown, jutting out her bottom lip. "Anyway let's not talk about it, what were you about to watch?"

"Are you serious?" Naya laughed and she could see the playful cat grin that Heather wore when she was playing around.

"Are we really gonna watch this episode together?"

"Why not? Are you embarrassed? Is it because you're gonna wanna kiss me?" Naya poked her Tongue out the side of her mouth.

Heather shoved Naya playfully, "You're very sure of yourself!"

"Soy Caliente!" Naya smirked.

"Easy there Santana!" Heather got up from her seat and made her way to the kitchen and helped herself to a wine glass and opened up the wine she'd brought with her.

They quietened down when the show started.

They watched in silence, until the scene with Brittany and Santana at the locker. A smile on both their faces, watching as their alter egos displaying the cutest of scenes in front of their eyes.

"You were adorable here," Naya spoke softly, turning her head to smile at Heather.

Heather turned her head and smiled shyly, a red blush growing on her cheeks.

The scenes with Brittany and Santana weren't as awkward as Heather thought they would be to watch together. It was actually really cute and she could see why there were so many fans of their relationship.

"Could you imagine if you tweeted to say you were watching this episode with me?" pondered Heather.

"Oh my goodness, they would go crazy! Tumblr would crash for sure!"

"We should totally troll the Brittana tag after the show!"

"We so should!" agreed Naya and they both laughed in unison.

The scene came to Amber singing 'I will always love you' and Naya watched as Heather sat uncomfortably in her seat, with the same look Brittany had. She remembered Heather telling her this was one of the songs that reminded her of her Dad. She reached out for Heathers hand and squeezed it in quiet reassurance. Heather looked across at Naya and smiled a silent thank you.

They poured each other new glasses of wine in-between the breaks and watched as it got to the scene at the Sugar shack.

By this time their hands had drifted apart, partly because they were pouring drinks and partly because they didn't want things to feel awkward as they neared the kissing scene.

Both their hearts were racing as they watched Brittany and Santana dance, as the song ended, their eyes glued to the screen as they watched the kiss.

"I totally wanted to slip my Tongue in," Heather broke the silence.

Naya didn't say anything. She as lost in a world of her own, remembering the feeling of Heathers lips on hers and wishing it was real. Wishing that they could have practiced it in private first. Remembering the feeling of giving herself to Heather as she wrapped her arms around Naya. How they lingered in that embrace for a couple of seconds after Brad cut the scene.

"Hello! Earth to Nay!"

She shook herself out of the daydream and came back to real life, "Sorry, what did you say?"

"Never mind," Heather sighed. She lifted her glass and sunk the last of the wine. She placed the glass back on the coffee table and sat back, "We should totally make own our playlist."

"What do you mean?" Naya asked, as she moved from the lounge to the kitchen to get the rest of the red wine.

"Bring your laptop back with you and we can make a playlist, like the one Brittany made Santana."

"Yeah real funny HeMo!"

"No I'm serious," she followed Naya out to the kitchen and lifted herself up onto the worktop as Naya handed her, her glass back. "we could make a cd, you know, of like, both our favourite songs so when either of us is not around we have something to remember each other by."

Naya contemplated the idea at first. Wasn't that usually the kind of thing couples do? she took a slow sip of her wine before she answered. "As long as it hasn't got sappy love songs on it," she joked.

Heather didn't say anything. "Just go get your laptop Nay and we'll make one." she jumped down off the work surface and made her way back to the sofa.

Naya returned a minute later with her laptop and opened it up, clicking on the the iTunes icon on the bottom of the screen.

"Are we really doing this?" Naya asked, scrunching up her face, "Do you not feel it's a bit corny and like, this is what couples do.."

"No it isn't!" Heather protested, "I've made CDs for my friends before.."

"Really?" Naya raised her eyebrow questioningly.

Heather didn't say anything, she took the laptop from Naya and clicked the '+' on the left hand side to make a new playlist.

"Answer the question!"

"Why?"

"Because I want you to.."

"Ok fine," Heather sighed, "I haven't, okay."

"So why for us then?" Naya asked as she twisted her body to face Heather, to gauge some kind of reaction to her answer.

Heather turned to look Naya in the eye, hoping Naya would understand without having to say the words. The unspoken words hopng to be louder than those she spoke.

"Well.." Naya prompted.

"Because," Heather paused and licked her lips. She took a deep breath, "because you're special to me. You mean more. You know that Nay. I just," she sighed, "I just want our friendship to be special. It's not everyday you connect with someone on the level we did and I'd like to treasure that. So we're gonna make this playlist. Kapeesh?"

Naya choked back a happy giggle. Her cheeks had blushed and she was grinning from ear to ear. "Kapeesh? You dork!"

She tried to cover up the fluttering in her heart. How it felt like it had grown twice it's size and wouldn't stop filling with love for her best friend. She was absolutely head over heels for her.

"Okay, we'll make this playlist. So whats the first track?" Naya smiled.

"Well duh," Heather smiled back, "we spent like a tonne of time over the summer listening to Adele so obviously 'Daydreamer!"

Naya watched as Heather clicked on the track and dragged it over to the playlist, looking at the other songs in the list. She couldn't help but let her eyes wander to 'Make you feel my love'. She was instantly taken back to nights where she'd sat with her iPod on listening to that song over and over and crying to herself. She shook her head to rid the memory, stopping any emotion coming back to her.

"What else?" Naya asked.

Heather randomly scrolled through the enormous list of songs making funny faces to make Naya laugh. She was successful.

"Oh my god!" Heather squealed. "You have this! This is going on!" she dragged the track over to the playlist.

"What song?"

"That really pretty version of 'Wherever you will go' by Charlene Soraia. I love song and I totally would go wherever you would go," Heather smiled, grabbing at Naya's hand.

Naya didn't say anything. She just swallowed to hold back tears that had started to well up and distort her vision.

"We should totally put that Beyoncè track on there too. That 'Start Over' song."

Naya finally found her voice again. "Oh god I LOVE that song. We used to sing that all the time!"

"I know right! It's going straight on." she dragged the song to the playlist, "What about you babe, what songs do you want?"

Naya took the laptop back and clicked the mouse to the search bar and typed in 'Florence and the Machine'. A plethora or Florence tracks were brought up and she clicked and dragged one over to the playlist.

"You've got the love?" Heather asked.

"Yeah," Naya answered, "Sometimes just knowing I have your love, gets me through." She felt brave for being so honest.

They both smiled shyly and looked back at the laptop screen.

"Ok what else?"

Naya scrolled down to the Black Eyed Peas and dragged 'Meet Me Halfway' to their playlist.

"Why that song?"

"Don't you remember?" Naya asked, a little hurt.

Heather shook her head.

"Well I do. When we first met that was the song you were always humming. I set it as my ringtone for when you called me and when you called I used to sing it to you." Naya smiled at the memory, "so that song reminds me of you."

"Oh yeah!" Heather remembered, "I was totally obsessed with that song! Ok my turn to add one now."

Heather took the laptop back and aimlessly scrolled through the list until one caught her eye and without a second thought, she put it straight on the playlist.

"Hang on! I didn't get to see!" Naya pouted.

"Just go grab me a disc and we can burn this playlist!"

Naya went to the her bedroom to find the discs and came back to find Heather playing a song out loud. "Van Morrison? Really?"

"Hey! We share the same surname ok, we're totally related!" Heather laughed and that made Naya smile.

"But 'Brown eyed girl' though.." Naya trailed off at the end, in search of a sharpie pen.

"It's the last track on our CD. You're my brown eyed girl."

Naya turned from where she was standing with the pen in her hand. The two words that had plucked at her heartstrings and almost made a song. 'Our' meaning that they both shared something and 'My' meaning she belonged to Heather. She had no idea how two such simplistic words held so much power and love in them. Her breath hitched in her throat and all she could do was smile.

She handed Heather a CD which she burnt the playlist to. Once it had done, she took it back, wrote 'Heather and Naya's infinite playlist' on it, added a small heart and handed it back to Heather.

"Thank you," Heather smiled, her eyes glistening as he she pulled Naya in for a hug.

"You're welcome," she replied and she kissed Heather on the cheek and they pulled apart. "Happy Valentines day."

Leap Year Day.

Heather took the CD in her hands and launched it across the trailer. It collided with the wall and bounced off and hit a glass set on a lower table, which slid off and smashed onto the floor, into a million pieces.

The glass became a metaphor for what had happened that day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey! Just wanted to thank those of you who have left reviews. I never intended in doing more than one chapter but I sort of wanted to carry on with it.**

**Thank you also to those who have favourite this and stuff, since this is my first time I've posted something that was a great incentive.**

**:)**

* * *

><p>Naya sat in her chair, gripping the hot coffee in her hands, as if it was the only thing keeping her grounded at that moment.<p>

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Dianna walking towards her, hesitate and take a seat a couple of chairs away, opening up her laptop and staring at the screen.

She made her way over to where Dianna was sitting and sat on the chair next to her. She took a sip of her coffee and sighed, "I'm sorry."

Dianna didn't look up from her laptop, clearly still annoyed at Naya's earlier behaviour, but knew how to broach her. "And so you should be."

"We did have a fight.. Me and Heather."

Dianna looked up to face Naya and cocked her eyebrow, "No shit Sherlock!"

Naya rubbed at her forehead, hoping that would take away the searing pain. "I think I've fucked this up for good."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Dianna asked, still keeping her gaze on her laptop screen. She knew Naya. If she was forceful she wouldn't get a word out of her. Sometimes she was too scarily like Santana.

"It's complicated."

"Things usually are between you two."

"Can I ask you something?" Dianna nodded and waited for the question.

"Did you mean what you said earlier.. That she loves me?"

Dianna closed her browser and shut her laptop screen, placing it on the free chair next to her. She turned so she could face Naya. "If you have to ask me that question, then you're more stupid than I thought you were."

Naya hung her head and sighed, "She came and told me herself, but how can she when she wont fully commit to me?"

"Ok stop!" Dianna put her hand up. "I'm sick of this pity party. You want to hear this straight I'll give it to you. Love, as simply beautiful as it is, is a very vulnerable thing. You don't just give your heart away to anyone, as you well know. If she loves you, it's because she means it. I saw the way you guys used to be before you had your little thing. You were absolutely besotted with each other, we could all see it. We all still see it."

Naya remained silent. She could always count on Dianna to tell her the truth.

"I'm a believer in fate and destiny. You can try and control it all you want, but people come into your life for a reason," she continued smiling. "Heather wasn't even meant to be in this show, so the fact she is and you two had to play on screen friends is fate. As was you becoming best friends with each other outside of that. Things like that don't happen everyday. But you two fell in love and it was beautiful to watch your love blossom. So for you to ask me if she loves you is as ridiculous as asking me if I love my dog or if Lea loves Broadway or if Kevin loves MJ. It's a given, Naya."

"But what about Taylor?"

"A hurdle on the track that you'll both work out and see the end in sight."

Naya paused. She could see where this was heading but she wanted someone else to tell her. "And what is at the end?"

Dianna grabbed hold of Naya's hand for reassurance. "You two being together. Some people are meant to be in this world. Get your girl Nay!"

Earlier that afternoon

Heather tried but failed to wrap her head around everything that happened. If this was what an emotional rollerocaster felt like, she wished she was too short to ride. Everything felt different, but at the same time everything was the same. They were still Heather and Naya, still best friends who were in love but wouldn't push forward. But now Naya had thrown a stone in the water. The ripples getting bigger and wider apart.

Heather felt like she had lost Naya for good and the ache in her heart was a physical pain. Where would she be without her best friend? She needed her. Needed her more than was healthy for someone to be dependent on another, but she didn't care.

It was ironic that this was the kind of situation that she would have spoken to Naya about, but she couldn't.

Her head was a mess. Weighing up different options. She didn't want them to be options. The obvious answer was to be with Naya but for that to happen she'd have to break up with Taylor and as much as he said things that hurt her sometimes, she couldn't do that.

She remembered last season of Glee and how Life seemed to be imitating Art right now. It was frustrating to say the least. She knew she could be happy if she was with Naya and for those brief seconds where she thought about them being together, a weight lifted off her shoulders and she felt happy. Sadly, reality hit her square in the heart and things weren't that simple.

"Heather open the door!" shouted a voice from outside. She was so lost in her own world, she hadn't even heard the knocking.

"I'm not in the mood to talk!" she shouted back.

"Just open this door HeMo!"

She pulled her body up from the seat, being careful not to stand on the shattered glass that she hadn't bothered to clear up, and opened the door to find Dianna standing there.

"I really just want to be alone right now, Di, Sorry," Heather stepped away from the door and went to push it back closed.

Dianna put her foot in the way of the door and pushed it back open, "I can appreciate that and any other day I would leave you be but not right now."

Heather sat back at the table without saying a word.

"I can't stand back and watch two of my good friends break each other hearts." Dianna said matter of factly, as she made her way to the table where Heather was sat. She glanced down as the light made the shattered glass pieces glimmer almost like diamonds.

Heather still didn't say anything. She didn't feel like there was anything left to say.

"Are you just going to sit there and say nothing?"

"I dont have anything to say to."

Dianna shook her head in disbelief. She looked to where Heathers eyeline was and saw the bag she was staring at.

"Can I look at what's in the bag?"

"No!" Heather shouted and grabbed hold of it, snapping out of her daze. "Sorry I didnt mean to shout, it's just.. Its personal."

"Just talk to me."

"There's nothing left for me to say, Di, I mean what do you want me to say?"

Dianna perched on the edge of the table and folded her arms, "Do you love her?"

Heather felt her heart leap in her chest thinking about her love for Naya. Did she get butterflies in her stomach when she saw her? Yes. Did she just want to smile for no reason when she was with her? Yes. Did she love her with her whole being? Yes.

"Of course I love her!"

"Then why are you two hurting each other. I saw Naya earlier. She was wearing the same broken expression as you are."

"Things aren't always as simple as they seem," Heather sighed.

"Love is." Dianna replied moving towards the sofa. "It's the simplest thing in the world. It's only hard when you put obstructions in the way."

"And there are plenty of obstructions."

"Really? Because I cant see any."

"Taylor? My boyfriend?" Heather put empahsis on boyfriend to try and make a point.

"With all due respect Heather, I've never seen you act the way you do when you're with Naya, when you are with Taylor. You may love him, but I think you feel like you HAVE to love him. When you're with Naya, your smile lights up the room and I can almost see you heart swelling in your chest."

"Is it that obvious?" Heather blushed.

"It really is," Dianna smiled. "So what's stopping you being together?"

"I think things have gone past the point of no return."

"You'd be surprised what you can sort out if you communicate well."

Heather nodded. She really did want to be with Naya. She wanted to talk about things properly.

"She won't want to talk to me," Heather said sadly.

Dianna got up from her seat and made her way over to the door. She turned to face Heather and smiled. "I think you're the only person she wants to speak to."

The clock on the wall just chimed 10pm. It had been a long emotional day and Naya was exhausted. Every bone in her body ached and every muscle felt limp as if she had danced or been active all day. But she hadn't. This was all in her head and the emotions of the day were coming out in physical pain. She'd never experienced this before.

She didn't even want to go to bed, afraid of what her subconscious would replay in her mind, recalling the days events. Making them ten times worse than they were. There was no way she was ready to deal with that.

She trudged into the kitchen and filled the kettle with water, getting a mug and chamomile tea bag out of the cupboards, almost on auto pilot, like she did most evenings.

The silence of her house was usually unbearable, but not tonight. She was glad of the quiet. She was able to clear her mind and think about what she wanted to and not have it interrupted with tv tidbits or random radio advertisements.

The kettle had just boiled when she heard knocking on her front door. She put her head in her hands and rubbed her eyes, wanting to ignore the person on the other side of the door.

Without looking through the peep hole she opened the door to see Heather standing there.

"I know I'm probably the last person you want to talk to or to see right now but I just really needed to come here so we could have a talk about things. Can I come in?"

Naya half laughed, half smiled. If she knew Heather as well as she did, she knew that she had been practicing this little speech all the way to Naya's house, not wanting to mess it up.

Naya moved aside and opened the door invitingly and stepped aside so Heather could come in.

Heather glanced at Naya quickly, saying a silent thank you as she stepped through the door.

"I was just making a tea," Naya pointed towards the kitchen, "can I get you something?"

Heather looked at her quizzically. This Naya couldnt be the same one who had given her, her stuff back, the one who was incredibly hurt and angry but on second thoughts her movements and persona right know showed all the signs of a person who was tired of all the drama.

Heather felt the same. It had been a challenging day to say the least. A lot had happened and it was funny how things can be ok one minute then completely change the next. Sometimes the lack of uncertainty, was unnerving to her. She was the kind of tell it like it is person and when others weren't the same, it didn't feel right.

"Forget the drinks Nay, I just want to talk," Heather spoke directly.

"Ok," replied Naya and she gestured to the dining table.

Heather nodded and they made there way to the table, pulling out seats directly adjacent from each other, to not make things awkward.

Neither of them spoke for at least a minute, a million words running through their minds, but neither of them finding the right ones to form the best starting point.

"I'm sorry," Naya started, "I know today's been a confusing day but I just wanted to apologise for the way I acted."

"I'm the one who should be sorry."

"Let's not play this game, it's both our faults."

"That I can agree with," Heather nodded and catching Naya's eye she smiled.

Naya returned the smiled and she felt her body relax. She didn't realise how tensed up she'd been. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Us," Heather replied quickly.

Naya's body tensed again, "let's face it Heather, there is no us anymore." She sighed and looked at the table and ran her hand over the grain in the wood, distracting herself from having to look at Heather. She eventually looked up and caught Heathers watery gaze starring back. She continued. "I love you, probably more than I think I've ever been in love with anyone in my life, but things are too complicated. Reality is," she hung her head sadly, feeling her own tears build up, "we can never be together."

"I love you, Naya," Heather said, a single tear trickling down her cheek.

"But..?" Naya questioned.

"No buts, I just love you."

Their gaze intensified, both hoping they had gained the power to read minds.

"Heather, you're with Taylor, this isn't fair on me," Naya got up form the table, turning her back on Heather for a second to wipe the back of her hand over her cheek, to hide the tear that had escaped. "It's been a long day. I can't take anymore, I think you should leave."

Heather remained in her seat. She had no intention of going anywhere.

"Sit back down." Heather said, pointing to the chair, "we need to talk."

Naya sighed heavily and did as she was told.

Heather lifted her right hand to the table and laid it out in front of her. The single diamond in the ring glittering in the light.

"Why are you wearing my ring?" Naya asked angrily.

"My girlfriend gave it to me," Heather smiled, "I didn't want to wear it on my ring finger as I figured things were a little strained right now, but when the time was right she'd ask me properly and I could move it to where it should rightfully sit." She swallowed and look up at Naya.

"If this is some kind of sick joke Heather.."

"I broke up with Taylor earlier," Heather butted in, "Things haven't been ok for a while and I decided that I should take advantage of the good things in my life. There's only one person who I want to be with for the rest of my life. You are the good thing in my life Naya and I intend on keeping you in my life forever because I love you more than anything."

"So what does that mean for us? Are we..?"

"I'm yours Naya, for now, for tomorrow, for everyday that comes after that until forever."

Naya's heart swelled in her chest and her pulse was racing.

Heather got up from from where she was sitting and made her way around the table to stand next to Naya. She bent down to be at eye level with her and looked into her eyes, "I love you."

"I love you too," Naya sobbed out before pulling Heather in for a tender kiss.


End file.
